How I Spent My "MEMORIAL" Vacation

Since this is Labor Day weekend and I have to do yard and housework all weekend than I will tell about my Memorial Day vacation. This tale starts a week before memorial weekend. Shades and I already had reservations for three days and two nights in Gattlinburg, TN for the weekend and I was trying to schedule a trip to Wyoming in July through my time share. Just when they were finalizing the trip I was told that this years points would expire in May (not July as I thought) and couldn't be used for that trip and I didn't have enough remaining points from next year to book the trip. Most of my points for next year were already spent on child-ling #2's first wedding anniversary trip to a ski resort. That left only two weeks to use this years points. As a result I had the book a resort in St. Augustine, FL for the day after the Gattlinburg trip.

All appeared well with what now was a week long trip. No problem (I had plenty of leave to cover). I even found a go-cart race just north of Gattlinburg for Saturday so I decided to leave Friday afternoon, get a room in Cleveland, TN, and go to the race Saturday.

All this time I had a bug to buy another motorcycle since summer was coming and I had to sell my last one to buy my micro farm. The farm deal was settled and I just wanted one bad. When I left Cleveland to go to the go-cart track I passed a motorcycle dealership having a tent sale so Shades and I stopped in. Shades found it first. I almost missed it. It was a bike just like my old one but with a little different styling and more optional features. Through much debate with myself I ended up buying the bike and the rest of the weekend we rode all over the smokey mountains. We had a great time but missed the go-cart races.

Buying the bike did create a problem. We were scheduled to leave Gattlinburg on Monday morning and had to be in St. Augustine by 6 PM Monday evening. What to do with the car and bike? Either drive them both to St. Augustine or drive the bike home and then leave for St. Augustine. The only real solution was to drive the bike home on Sunday and leave from there Monday morning.

Sunday afternoon (a day early) we left for home. Me on the bike and Shades in the car. Just as my luck would have it in the middle of nowhere it started to rain. I pulled over and let the rain blow through. At that point I told Shades that if the rain returned I was just going to continue on. As soon as I started I hit more rain (continuous) and just rode on for about half an hour until a Wally World was spotted. I was soaked to the bone but stopped in and bought a rain suit. That made the next three hours in the rain tolerable.

I was used to riding a motorcycle in the rain so it wasn't too bad, however, five miles from the house I looked in my rear view mirror and saw "blue lights" pulling Shades over to the curb. I started to stop but decided to continue to the house, change cloths, and go back to rescue her. Don't be too hard on me on this issue since I was soaked to the bone for over three hours on a motorcycle with no tag (blew off in the rain), all the sales papers were buried in the trunk, and it wasn't worth the risk of getting two tickets.

Before I could change my clothing Shades arrived at the house. The policeman thought she was drunk. As I swerved to miss the water in the road she would swerve with me which made her appear to be a drunk driver. At least she didn't get a ticket. She was a little shook up when I left her alone with the officer. She said to herself "TomKat don't leave me !!! : BUT I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE !!!".

The next day we left in the car for St. Augustine. The resort there was wonderful. The rest of the week was just a great week. The only disappointment that we had was that we didn't get into the water in the bay or beach. That first day of riding the bike Shades leg found the exhaust pipe and had a bad burn (very painful) on he ankle that we had to protect. I have learned that if something can happen bad for Shades it usually does but she is tough and tries to not let it limit her too much.

Overall it was a good vacation adventure. I can't wait for my next.

SUPER DAD !!!

Tonight was a rendezvous with child-ling # 3 at her favorite restaurant. While we were eating and discussing her first week in college she received a text message with a picture of a boy she didn't know holding up his shirt showing his abbs. She said "This strange guy sent me his picture. He must have the wrong number. Soon after he sends more messages. This is the text messages that followed:

Child-ling: "Sorry but you sent your picture to the wrong number."
Dude: "My name is Dude and I like you. We need to meet."
Child-ling: "I don't know you so buzz off."
Dude: "Don't be that way, we need to meet."

At this time I put on my cape and tell child-ling to hand me the phone. This is what follows:

Super Dad: "Where do you live?"
Dude: "I live in "X" town and go to "Y" school."
Super Dad: "My daughter said buzz off so you had better buzz off. I have your picture, name, location, and school. I can find you. (sent with super dad picture).
Dude: " What the @#*$."
Super Dad: "What the @#*$ is right: it is your ass."
Dude: "I will never text this number again."
Super Dad: "Smart dude. Now me and my biker buddies won't have to go hunting."

End of conversation. Child-ling and I got a good laugh. She knows that Super Dad will always be there to protect her. Child-ling # 3 said "Where were you last year when "Q" tried to hit up on me." I may be Super Dad but even I can't be everywhere at once. We had another good laugh.

It really felt great to once again put on that cape and rescue the child-ling from evil and injustice as only a Super Dad could.

MESSAGE FROM LISA

Lisa wants me to share her thoughts:

EVERY DAY:
SMILE
SAY GOOD MORNING
PRAY FOR OTHERS AS WELL AS YOURSELF
GIVE A LITTLE OF YOUR TIME
OPEN A DOOR FOR SOMEONE
OFFER FRIENDSHIP TO RECEIVE FRIENDSHIP
JUST BE KIND
LEND A HELPING HAND
GIVE A COMPLIMENT OR PAT ON THE BACK
GIVE PRAISE
WORK A JOB WELL
SHOW RESPECT
VISIT THE ELDERLY
GIVE A HUG
SHARE A KISS
LISTEN TO WHAT OTHERS HAVE TO SAY
LISTEN TO THE BIRDS SINGING
KEEP IN TOUCH WITH FRIENDS
SHARE MEMORIES
SAY I LOVE YOU AND MEAN IT
GIVE ENCOURAGEMENT

The most improtant thing to share with others is a kind heart and let them know that you will be there when times are good and bad.

Well said Lisa.

REVELATION - Awareness Training

In responding to M. Jones last night I became aware of a social dysfunction that I possess. In a strange way I reject people without even knowing it. That is why most people's first opinion of me is either "Jerk" or "Elitist" (I never understood this perception). It is a true handicap such as a speech impediment not in the sense that it is socially unacceptable but in the sense that it does make social communication a little more difficult than someone without the impediment.

I DON'T SEE SMALL STUFF !!! You may say "BIG DEAL" what is the problem with that. Well it can be a big deal in a social setting. People (especially women) communicate in subtle ways. When those subtle signals are ignored by someone than that person is filed under jerk or elitist automatically. The poor slob never saw that he had dismissed someones signal and would never do that on purpose but that doesn't negate the offence.

I knew I had this small stuff problem all my life but never knew why until a standard shrinkology test confirmed the cause. Brain wiring from birth that can't be fixed. But maybe it can be trained a little. I really never thought of it as a problem except in my marriage (You never notice my hair, new dress, new curtains, etc.). Now I see it ranges into all my social ventures.

Awareness Training: One more thing for my to-do list (any suggestions?).

COMMENT CORNER (SOCIALIZATION)

M. Jones I love your questions and comments. Most of them you answered yourself. You can't really know a person in a one time meeting. You can form a first impression either through instinct (attraction or warning) or a response to their looks, body language, etc. Knowing a person takes time being with them and somehow getting them to stop their social act as you call it. Basically we all have some level of the fear of rejection. In business you are confident to talk to people because they can't reject you but only whatever your business represents. In a social environment you are putting yourself on the line for rejection. We (you and I) tend to talk to people that we think will not reject us. Sometimes we pick the right person to talk to and sometimes we pick the wrong. In a social environment I like you tend to stay quiet and listen until I feel comfortable sharing my ideas or opinions. There again sometimes I am accepted into the group conversation and other times I am ignored and remain on the outside of the group. Those are the risk we must take in a social environment. Minimizing my fear of rejection and maximizing my risk factor is my goal for socializing.

When I was married my wife and I slowly became an island unto ourselves. In 20 years of marriage I developed no real friends but many acquaintances. During the divorce process I realized that all my friends were from before my marriage and several of those were driven away and have never returned. Now I must learn how to develop new friends all over again and it is a tough process but I have a plan.

The first step is DON'T CARE if people like you are not. Be yourself all the time. Shed the act if you can. High risk I admit.

If people get a bad first impression of you (very high probability for me for some unknown reason) try and give them the opportunity to get a second or third impression (some people will not give you any chance after the first - write them off and go on). ALL my new friends had a bad first impression of me but I gave them an opportunity for a second impression which they accepted and it payed off for both of us.

DO NOT let the fear of rejection scare you from approaching other people (this is the hardest for me I have to admit - work in progress).

Find a true (fearless) people person and hang with them. They will attract people like a magnet and give you a chance to meet new people. I have a good friend like this that I hang with. She can talk to a bowling ball in a pool parlor and talk them into playing checkers.

And always BE YOURSELF. No acting allowed.

Expect others around you to be acting but give them a chance if you can to let down their guard.

That is my plan. There are probably better ones but this is the one I developed. Now to see if I can do it so it can work its magic.

Now for the final question: Yes!! God put a lady in my life just after the divorce who has become my best friend. She is the people person referenced above. We do many crazy (most would say) things together and have had many adventures. We help each other as true friends. Like JOB in the bible she has had more medical trials than anyone I have ever known. I have been there for her when she couldn't function and she gave me a reason for going on through the heartache of divorce. I needed to be needed and she needed me for her survival. She kept my feet on the ground like no one else could. Now that she is better I am teaching her to grow up ( 15 in a 50+ body) and take care of herself since I helped bury the last family member she could rely on to protect her from her nieve self. She was never allowed to mature properly so that she could be manipulated by her family. In three years she has grown to an adult in most respects and I am proud of her. Others helped during the year long divorce but she helped after the divorce.

THE KING ??? and I

Once upon a time in a country not too far away lived a King of notable reputation. He was skilled in all manner of affairs concerning the neighboring clans and kingdoms. Assigned to this king was a trusted guard who was well liked by the King. This guard had a particular child-ling of approximately six years of age. During certain holiday feast the King would invite his guards, servants, honored yeomen, and their families to the celebration. For he was a very wise king and knew the advantages of keeping his closest subjects happy.

One day a stranger to the kingdom noticed the good relationship between the king and his trusted guard while attending a speech to the kingdom's subjects. When the speech was done and the King's procession passed by she noticed a little girl calling to her daddy with pride. The stranger perceived that the little girl was calling to the guard and inquired of the girl. "Have you ever met the king?" The little girl looked perplexed and turned to her mother. The mother said: "Do you remember the man who let you ride on his pony during the festival?" The little girl looked at the stranger with a sparkle in her eye and said: "OH!!! You mean GEORGE." For the little girl did not see a "king" as everybody else did. All she saw was a kind man who was her friend.

We should all be more like the little child and not look for the social status, power, position, or wealth of others but instead we should be looking for the character of the person. The little girl knew what was really important.

Comment Corner

Thank you for your comments. That is what makes this blog exciting.

First: Brain Test can be found at the following link: http://mindmedia.com/braintest.html
This link was pilfered from the Going Goofy site which is very insightful.

The Brain Age is a game for the Nintendo DS system. Brain Age is the basic game. Brain Age 2 is not for the average mortal brain. It is for people who have extreme brain to eye coordination (adds about 40 years to the untrained brain age: that would put me well over 110).

Second: First my name is Tommy and years ago I read that it meant "Seeker of Truth". I liked that interpretation because it fit so well with my mentality. Truth even if it hurts is one of my mottos. Second I have been hurt by my first marriage of 20 years to a lady with an officially undiagnosed mental condition which in the advanced stages is incurable. I now know what it is, that it is uncontrollable by me or even her, and do not blame her for it (knowing does explain a lot of unusual occurrences and actions in our marriage). I am moving on in my life without her because to be tied to her any longer would destroy my soul ( I know several examples that I call the LIVING DEAD). I don't know what I am looking for in a woman but I do know that I will recognize it when I see it ( most call it love at first sight but I call it God's provision). When I am ready he will provide or not. Either way I am going to live life to the fullest for as long as it last. Another motto is "No Regrets".

Third: Bud Lite Buddy welcome to the site. I would love to chew the cud with you anytime. First redneck is an attitude (just ask my kids and friends) not a geographic location, IQ, or lord of the junkyard (here in my county you can't have stuff laying around your house or you get a fine, go to jail, and loose your stuff). New county law just passed. There has been more junk hauled out of this county in the last six months than in the last ten years. Carports are going up everywhere (derelict vehicles must be covered by a shed). The city has taken over the country. Democrats must have taken the county. I don't have any hound dogs (my friends have the Coon Dogs) but I do have two Chows and about eight cats (the neighbor likes to use them for target practice or I would have over thirteen). The neighbors dog down the road ate my chicken and rooster. Soon I will be in the market for goats to trim the lawn. You are right about the 72 year old brain as long as it still works at some level and respects people no matter how bad they look. My kids called me an "old geezer/old fart" as soon as I turned fifty and I take pride in that designation. Every day above dirt is a blessing.

Brain Age Revisited

My brain age was a little shocking, however, upon reflection it shouldn't have been. Not enough books and too much TV. I haven't even built any airplanes in the last four years. Vegging out in my recliner has taken its toll but there is always hope. Just a little mental and physical exercise and I can whip that bad boy back into shape (I hope). This blog should help a little.

Brain Test & Age

Auditory 25%
Visual 75%
Left 50%
Right 50%

Brain Age 72 Years (older but wiser)

Tommy you exhibit an even balance between left- and right-hemisphere dominance and a slight preference for visual over auditory processing. With a score this balanced, it is likely that you would have slightly different results each time you complete this self awareness quiz (yep! been there : done that).

You are a well rounded person, distinctly individualistic and artistic, an active and multidimensional learner. At the same time, you are logical and disciplined (logical : yes, disciplined : no), can operate well within an organization, and are sensitive towards others without losing objectivity. You are organized and well directed. Although a "thinking" individual, you "take in" entire situations readily and can act on intuition (yep!).

You sometimes tend to vacillate in your learning styles. Learning might take you longer than someone of equal intellect, but you will tend to be more thorough and retain the material longer than those of other individuals. You will alternate between logic and impulse (yep!). This vacillation will not normally be intentional or deliberate, so you may experience anxiety in situations where you are not certain which aspect of yourself will be called on.

With a slight preference for visual processing, you tend to be encompassed in your perceptions, process along multidimensional paths and be active in attacking of situations and learning.

Overall you should feel content with your life and yourself (I do). You are, perhaps, too critical of yourself -- and others -- (understatement) while maintaining an "openness" which tempers that tendency. Indecisiveness is a problem (yep!) and your creativity may be in keeping with your potential. Being a pragmatist, you downplay this aspect of yourself and focus on the more immediate, obvious and the more functional (utility always wins out).


WOW!!! This is a little different than I expected. I always thought of myself as left handed - left brained. Sometimes when I retook the brain test (I couldn't resist the challenge in the first paragraph) the results said that I am slightly left brain dominant. I have to admit that most of the above analysis fits too well for me to reject it.

Recently I had a chance to increase my time share points at a true bargain price. Even though I could afford it I couldn't without a lot of additional financial stress so I decided to reject the deal. My brain said "GO it is a bargain that you would be a fool to turn down" and my heart said "Don't do it - it is not right for you at this time". I followed my heart and I am glad that I did. Right after that decision an unexpected bill rolled in for almost $700.00. If I had taken the bargain than I would not have been able to pay that bill or also help a good friend get through a financial crisis. I tell my kids to listen to their heart and their head but the heart is usually right. Intuition rules.